IT Leaders

00;00;00;24 - 00;00;24;21
Olivia Fitchett
I want to take you back to 2015. And in 2015, I was starting my tenure and working at the white House, and, it was the first three weeks and, you know, the first three weeks of any job, we kind of struggle with the same thing. We're going, where's the bathroom? What's everyone's name? What's my log in?

00;00;24;21 - 00;00;49;27
Olivia Fitchett
And then forgetting it 15 times? It's any different at the white House, those things still existed. And so three weeks in, we're learning those things. But one thing that makes working at the white House a little bit different than just any job, you have to learn not only where the bathroom is, not only your coworkers name, and not only your new job, but you also have to learn a lot of security.

00;00;49;29 - 00;01;10;08
Olivia Fitchett
The white House is one of the most secure places in the whole world, and there are places that we had to learn very quickly. We're not allowed there. We are allowed here. You get in big trouble if you're over here and everyone's got different colored badges they wear in every color badge means you're allowed in certain areas and you're not allowed in certain areas, so there's a lot to learn.

00;01;10;08 - 00;01;27;18
Olivia Fitchett
Also, you have to learn the dog's names that sniff you when you come in. Okay. So that's important too. But we, we, we learning a lot. And one of those things that we had to learn when we came into the white House is how to get from where we were near the West Wing all the way over to the East Wing.

00;01;27;20 - 00;01;44;05
Olivia Fitchett
And there are a lot of ways we could get there. But, one task we did every single day was we had to take this blue binder from our area across the street to the west, from the west wing all the way over to the east wing. And that blue binder was really important. Here's what had in it.

00;01;44;08 - 00;02;00;29
Olivia Fitchett
It had, Michelle Obama's schedule for the day. It had her speeches that she needed to prepare for, for the day. And it had little notes that little kiddos have written her and we had hand-selected, and we put them in the blue binder, and she was going to hand write them, a response back. And we're going to send it back.

00;02;00;29 - 00;02;19;07
Olivia Fitchett
So it's very important that she gets there at the beginning of every single day. And so, every day my supervisor would walk with a few of us new, new hires, and, he would show us how to get to the East Wing, to her office. And the path went something like this. So we're in the building next to the West Wing.

00;02;19;07 - 00;02;34;19
Olivia Fitchett
Anybody been in the white House? You know? Yeah. So you're in the West Wing area. You go across, a driveway, you open the gate, you walk across the white House lawn, you get to the other side of the lawn. There's another security checkpoint. You have to go up the stairs, go down the hallway, hang a left hanger right.

00;02;34;21 - 00;02;53;09
Olivia Fitchett
And then you're at the first lady's office. And we put the blue binder down. Well, we got to go back. We go down the hallway. We go down the stairs. We go through the security checkpoint, walk across the lawn, open the gate, go across the driveway, and then we're back at our, desk. So again, like I said, it's three weeks and we're all kind of getting some new jobs.

00;02;53;09 - 00;03;12;14
Olivia Fitchett
Here's what I want you to do. Here's what I want you to do. And and so one day, my supervisor brings me into his office and he says, Olivia, how would you like it to be your responsibility to take that blue binder to the first lady's office? You can do it all by yourself. We've gone there. Oh, 15 days now.

00;03;12;14 - 00;03;29;27
Olivia Fitchett
You know the past. And I'm like, yeah, that's an easy yes. It's like if they're asking me if I wanted to check for $1 million, I'm like, yeah, I will be in charge of the first lady's success for the day, no problem. And so, I confidently took that binder the same way I did every day with the group, but this time alone.

00;03;29;27 - 00;03;55;03
Olivia Fitchett
Tuck that binder under, my my arm here. And I open the gate, and I start going across the driveway. Just like every day I open, I open the gate to the white House lawn, and I start walking across the white House lawn, and everything is going fine. I'm feeling super confident. It's going well until it doesn't. And, about right here move so everybody can kind of see this.

00;03;55;05 - 00;04;16;02
Olivia Fitchett
We've been to the white House, you know, about where that area is. Whenever I get about right here I hear a resounding voice behind me. And it's the voice I hope nobody in this room has ever heard before. When something like phrase, turn around with your hands up. It was a really great day to be me right then.

00;04;16;04 - 00;04;37;11
Olivia Fitchett
And so what I do, I do what you do when someone yells that at you and I put my hands up, Michelle Obama's binder goes goes fly in and I'm turning around slowly. And there's a Secret Service officer about 100 yards away from me. And he's got what I can only say is akin to like a super circular Nerf gun bazooka thing.

00;04;37;13 - 00;04;56;09
Olivia Fitchett
And it's pointed right at me and I'm going, Holy crap, what is going on? And I'm going, this is where Olivia goes like, this is this is it. You know, it's been great. Mom's going to get a letter home. This is awesome. And, you know, 22 years have been awesome, but this is it. And that's what I'm thinking.

00;04;56;09 - 00;05;12;29
Olivia Fitchett
And he. No joke. He does like this Jackie Chan thing. I wish I was making it up, but he goes like this, and he's like, like that. And I'm like, okay, because I want to walk toward the weapon. Like, this is what we want to do, walking toward him. And we finally get to this, this, this little hut they have on the front of the white House lawn.

00;05;13;01 - 00;05;30;15
Olivia Fitchett
He sits me down and he asks me, what are you doing on the white House lawn? And I said, I've done this every single day, since I got here, I work here, I'm just trying to get to the East Wing. I'm really confused. And he goes, let me see your badge. And I show him my badge.

00;05;30;15 - 00;05;48;26
Olivia Fitchett
And he said, oh, I understand. And I said, really? Because I'm going to have to pay for lots of therapy, and I need to know what to tell them. I need to know, I need to understand a little bit what's happening. And, he said, you have a blue light blue badge. And I'm like, yes, I have eyes.

00;05;48;26 - 00;06;11;19
Olivia Fitchett
Yeah. And, he said, you mentioned you're walking with your supervisor up until today. And I said, yeah, well, your supervisor has a navy blue badge. Light blue badges aren't allowed by themselves on the white House lawn. And so I'm like, oh, I am so sorry. I almost get I almost lose my my internship at this point. It's almost gone.

00;06;11;24 - 00;06;39;05
Olivia Fitchett
And the guy looks at me square in the eye. I'll never forget it. And he says, you don't belong here on this lawn. And and that moment I learned real quick what it felt like to not belong somewhere. This is really awkward. I felt really uncomfortable. I felt extremely misunderstood. And I felt pretty unsafe in a big way.

00;06;39;08 - 00;07;04;07
Olivia Fitchett
And not all of us have had experiences where we've had a weapon pointed at us on the white House lawn. I pray that never happens. And if you. But we've all had experiences where we've not belonged somewhere heavenly. Everybody has misunderstood, scared, maybe a little unsure. And here's the deal. We want to belong. Not belonging. Doesn't feel good.

00;07;04;09 - 00;07;33;23
Olivia Fitchett
But here's where it gets even more interesting. Not only are we people who want to belong, but we want to see others belong to. That's why something like this works. You remember that every single time I pull this up, there's somebody that I hear that goes, it's because we all know this early. 2000s. Sarah McLaughlin. We got in the arms of an angel.

00;07;33;23 - 00;07;57;23
Olivia Fitchett
Right? And we're, like, in our couch. Early 2000, Britney Spears just shaved her hair and we're going, these dogs are super, super, super sad. And all of a sudden we don't know how, but we like trip and fall and put in our credit card information. We're giving $19 a month, and it's because we see this commercial and it's like mangled dogs in concrete corners in the middle of nowhere and like, emaciated kittens.

00;07;58;00 - 00;08;20;28
Olivia Fitchett
And our hearts fall to the floor. Is there anybody that's like me that just cannot watch those anymore? They still play. I cannot do it. Yeah. I can't do it. Like something inside me just rips to pieces. I could be having an awesome day. This man comes on. Forget it. Like I need, like a 30 to 45 minute recovery period after seeing that, why does that work?

00;08;20;28 - 00;08;49;01
Olivia Fitchett
It's because the ASPCA, it knows that not only are we people that want to belong, we want to see others belong there. And includes cute little puppies, too. It breaks us when we don't see that belonging. They did an interview with Sarah McLaughlin. Right after these were filmed, and they ask her what it was. What was it like to have to film something so sad?

00;08;49;03 - 00;09;18;09
Olivia Fitchett
And she said, I still can't watch the commercials. It kills me. It kills me just watching it. So why? Why did it work? I mean, I mean, in the ASPCA skyrocketed and drawn donations. It it started this this ad campaign started in 2007. It started at $83 million annually a year, skyrocketed to $280 million a year from that commercial.

00;09;18;12 - 00;09;39;27
Olivia Fitchett
Why I work, it's because we know this from just being around people. But not only do is it just feel good to belong, but we're actually hardwired for it. We're hardwired to be in community with people. We're hard wired, hard wired for it at home, were hard wired for it at a church, or we're hard wired for it at work or wherever you you do your community things.

00;09;39;27 - 00;10;13;21
Olivia Fitchett
We are people that want that belonging. And here's why. Current neuroscience shows this. And I read this a couple of years ago and it blew my mind. The reason why why it's something watching this it like hurts us like anybody feel like that in your heart. Like your heart just pains. Here's the deal. Current neuroscience tells us that when we feel physical pain, like, if Deanna came up here and decked me in the arm pain, it shares a neuro receptor two.

00;10;13;22 - 00;10;36;25
Olivia Fitchett
The sensation we feel when we witness something like this. In other words, when we see disconnection. It hurts physically. That's why we use really violent language. If you think about it, when we talk about, I was part of this friend group or I'm part of this, this group at work, and they weren't supposed to say the thing that I told them in confidence, and then they told her.

00;10;36;27 - 00;10;56;28
Olivia Fitchett
And we say things like, I feel like I was stabbed in the back. That's violent. Guys like, come on, it feels you. Kiddo comes home. And they didn't make the soccer team. It feels like I was punched in the gut. My throat is tight. It feels like an elephant sitting on my chest. And we describe things like this, you hear?

00;10;56;29 - 00;11;19;29
Olivia Fitchett
I'm saying it's because we do. Neuroscience tells us that you're saying those things because you actually are feeling pain. And it's really, really, really interesting that there are people sitting on a rat all around us, to the left and to the right, the in our communities. That could be feeling that pain right now and maybe, maybe right now it's you.

00;11;19;29 - 00;11;40;23
Olivia Fitchett
Right now you're going, oh, I just don't kind of feel like I found my place anymore. And it kind of hurts that it. If it's not you, it might be might be somebody else. And I always like the way Brené Brown says it. Brené Brown fans out there, you know, Brené Brown, one loner. Love it. Love and belonging are irreducible needs for all people.

00;11;40;25 - 00;12;08;20
Olivia Fitchett
In the absence of these experiences, there is always suffering burns. Talking about that pain, feeling, suffering. It's painful. It's painful. I'm wondering if y'all everybody some people don't have enough at their table. But for the next couple minutes, I want you to think about and talk at your tables. If you if you're comfortable with it. A time when you did feel like you belong to a team.

00;12;08;22 - 00;12;25;06
Olivia Fitchett
We're talking about work. If you can keep it to work, talk about a time where you felt this deep sense of belonging. Was it after a project that you all had done together? Was it after your supervisor called you and said, hey, we couldn't have made that happen without you? What was it where you went? Oh, because we all know it.

00;12;25;06 - 00;12;47;14
Olivia Fitchett
We all know that feeling where you're like, oh, I right where I need to be. And hopefully everybody's had that. So take the next couple of minutes and chat about that at your tables if you will. All right. Go ahead and get back to me. I feel so all right. Go ahead and and bring it back. I know that wasn't enough time.

00;12;47;17 - 00;13;06;21
Olivia Fitchett
I wish I could go around and sit at every single table in here. Everybody. And we could all learn from one another. But is there one who. Let's not knock that over. Is there one brave soul that wants to share a time when they really felt like they belonged? No is a complete set. Hey, there you go. Sure.

00;13;06;23 - 00;13;47;27
Olivia Fitchett
So I don't believe in remote work, passion. And to prove that, I hired an intern that never ended up coming to our office. He lives in Washington state. And, To to give it the best opportunity possible. I followed, assignment six, basically, remote strategy and, So, you know, we talked for meetings, we had meetings, dedicated social conversations.

00;13;48;00 - 00;14;24;20
Olivia Fitchett
The first year, I was his team lead. I bought, everybody Christmas presents. The second year I did the same thing. But they also, they also bought me Christmas presents. And, This gentleman buys me, he knew I did. Oh, which is the art of drawing and cutting with the sword. And so he he bought me a, a Japanese made gyro training sword.

00;14;24;22 - 00;14;52;27
Olivia Fitchett
So that was awesome, right? So he leaves the company, for another another company that, it was the fourth company that offered him the job. He left because they offered him twice what we were paid, and had it. Yeah, right. Rightfully so. A year and a half later, he, invites, me to his wedding.

00;14;52;29 - 00;15;19;19
Olivia Fitchett
So I, I go to Washington from here, and, and I gave him, as a wedding present, a digging knife that I used, in the military, in in the shape of, of the wounded freight, but, wanted and used to save people and, and, he hugged me and cried and, so.

00;15;19;21 - 00;15;43;01
Olivia Fitchett
Absolutely. Yeah. What a great example, man. Thanks for sharing. And and here's the deal. But what you're talking about, we're going to get to in just a second. So I'm going to tie right what you, what you brought up in just a minute. But I wanted to share some statistics with you. Because sometimes I think that sometimes folks can listen to a talk on something like belonging and be like, oh, yeah, it feels good, but what's the bottom line?

00;15;43;03 - 00;16;08;13
Olivia Fitchett
Right? Here's the deal. Not only is is belonging and having a strong sense of it good for our yes, our heart, our body, our soul, but it's also a business strategy. And here's why. So Harvard Business Review did, did a survey in 2020, and they found that belonging is the top driver of employee engagement, the very top one.

00;16;08;15 - 00;16;30;04
Olivia Fitchett
And employees that had a high sense of belonging, they had a 56 increase in job, percent increase in job performance, 50% increase, or had lower turnover. And then 75 this was really interesting, 75% reduction in sick days. It's interesting. And so if for the rest of our time together we're going to talk strategy. We're going to talk about how we implement this.

00;16;30;04 - 00;16;48;27
Olivia Fitchett
And I'm going to tell you this is normally a longer talk. And so I didn't want to leave anything out for you. So I will tell you we're going to move pretty fast. We're not going to cover everything in depth. But I want you to please take pictures of anything you see. You're going to be able to have the recording to go back and listen to it, but it's going to be a little bit of a flyby.

00;16;48;27 - 00;17;07;11
Olivia Fitchett
Is that okay with everybody? Okay, so number one, I'm going to ask you to, do a little exercise really quick. I am going to up to early, I'm going to put a sentence up here and I'm going to have you do one thing. The one thing I want you to do is count the number of F's in the sentence you see is enough.

00;17;07;13 - 00;17;18;20
Olivia Fitchett
It's going to be it for a couple seconds.

00;17;18;22 - 00;17;49;24
Olivia Fitchett
All right. Who saw one or more F's? Should be. Most people should be. I'm not going to call anybody. Yeah. Two or more F's. Keep your hands up. Who saw three or more? Anybody see four or more hands went down? Anybody see five F's? Two, three, four. Anybody see six? One, two. Three people. They're six. And the people that are like, I saw two here.

00;17;49;25 - 00;18;16;03
Olivia Fitchett
Here's how. Here's what happened. We got finished. Files are the result of years of scientific study combined with the experience of many years. What did we miss of almost everyone. And this is like I was nervous for this one. I'm like, this is a group full of really smart people. We're probably going to get them all. Not we miss those things.

00;18;16;07 - 00;18;45;01
Olivia Fitchett
We miss small things and about people. And if we're not careful, we can start to treat our employees like this experience. And tell me your name one more time, dusty. All right, then, if we miss it, we don't have experiences like dusty. He had a moment somewhere along the line where he learned something about his employee, and his employee had a moment somewhere along the line where he learned something about dusty.

00;18;45;03 - 00;19;07;13
Olivia Fitchett
And so it's important to remember that we are bringing our whole self to work, our whole self, and in the air, space, people are saying it's almost impossible to check your stuff at the door anymore, and it's and it's impossible to do, but it's also, behind on the times. You can't do it. People bring their whole self to work.

00;19;07;13 - 00;19;27;11
Olivia Fitchett
And I'm not saying that as leaders, we need to be therapists, and we need to schedule 90 minutes every week with every employee we have. That's not what I'm saying. What I am saying is a check in can go a long way. A check in about nothing to do with work can go a long way. I was getting on the phone with a colleague not too long ago.

00;19;27;13 - 00;19;44;22
Olivia Fitchett
And it just. I wasn't trying to do this. I it just happened to hit my memory that her father passed away about a year ago, around that day. And when we got on the phone and I was literally, I love this person, I'm like, I want to know how she's doing. I wasn't it wasn't some strategic motive I had.

00;19;44;22 - 00;20;02;25
Olivia Fitchett
It wasn't anything like that. But I just as soon as we got on the call, we had lots of business to get through and I just said, hey, before we get into it, how are you doing? Your dad passed away about a year ago. You're doing okay? Just checking in. You wouldn't believe the way that conversation changed. You wouldn't believe it.

00;20;02;25 - 00;20;19;06
Olivia Fitchett
I don't say that to pat myself on the back. I to, like I said, I wouldn't even try to do it. But that conversation changed entirely because you check in, you can check in on things like that and death anniversary. You can check in on birthdays. You can check in on, well, what's what's that fun you got going on this weekend?

00;20;19;08 - 00;20;35;28
Olivia Fitchett
It can be anything but a simple check in can go a long way. I think dusty would agree with me on that one. Go a long way. I had one, one person told me. A client said, I just found out that Janet has a life outside of work and I'm like, yes, she does, but we don't think of that Doug was talking about earlier.

00;20;36;01 - 00;21;02;01
Olivia Fitchett
Sometimes we just come to work and we just go home, but just remembering that there's a whole other person that's going on behind the scenes is so important. There's a study, done in 2021 that talks about employees that felt like they were truly listened to. So we're going to move into our second part now, listening employees that were truly listened to, they had five times more.

00;21;02;01 - 00;21;24;19
Olivia Fitchett
They were five times more likely to feel a strong sense of belonging. They were five times more likely to feel empowered to do their best work, and there are four times more likely to report feeling included. And since the dawn of time, listening is half the battle, half the fight of building connection with people listening and chatting with people, hearing what they have to say.

00;21;24;24 - 00;21;40;06
Olivia Fitchett
And we don't have time to go over this next part. But I want to give you a really quick tool. If you want to either take a picture of this next slide, or if you want to wait and watch the recording and then take a picture of that. But here's a really easy way to develop rapport with someone and let them know you're listening.

00;21;40;06 - 00;22;02;17
Olivia Fitchett
Well, it's called acknowledge and validate. So we're going to acknowledge what they say. I'm hearing you say you got scheduled to work on holiday and you didn't want to. Next we're going to validate how they feel. Of course you feel mad. Of course. That's frustrating. Anybody in your shoes would feel frustrated. You don't have to agree with what they're saying.

00;22;02;17 - 00;22;21;09
Olivia Fitchett
You get the value. You're just validating how they feel. Super easy way to build connection with people not just at work, but at home too. So that's that's something I learned in coaching school, too. I learned it all the time. It just transform the way that I talk with people. Number three are we are aware of who's missing.

00;22;21;11 - 00;22;47;19
Olivia Fitchett
What I mean is, are we aware of who's starting to isolate themselves from the group? Zebras are probably one of my favorite animals. And here's why. Anybody like David Attenborough like listening to, like, nature documentaries, is watching, nature documentary recently. And, he was talking about how zebras have this really interesting, this really interesting way of keeping themselves safe.

00;22;47;19 - 00;23;10;18
Olivia Fitchett
They stay in packs. Zebras are black and white, we all know that. But whenever they move, it can look a little bit like an optical illusion. You can kind of see it right here. And so when they move, researcher this is a scientific term. They call this what's happening here. Motion dazzle. And that fun motion dazzle. And the predators that are out getting them, they can't pick out one for the other.

00;23;10;18 - 00;23;30;10
Olivia Fitchett
So they're safe when they're with the pack. But I can guarantee you, if all of us pack then to the next IT leaders meeting in Africa. Sorry, I stole. I told them the secret. We're going to Africa next IT leaders meeting, and we get on a safari and and we see this guy. It won't be long before we saw him, right?

00;23;30;13 - 00;23;55;07
Olivia Fitchett
Because it sticks out like a sore thumb. And when it's by itself, it's a vulnerable one. Even more interesting thing about zebras is the leaders. And this is where I want to land today. The leaders of the pack talking about like leaders like us, right? We're leading people. They have a really interesting job in the zebra. Kids zebra community.

00;23;55;10 - 00;24;21;09
Olivia Fitchett
What they do is they actually go around the pack as the pack is moving and don't miss this. And they take their noses and they push them. The weak, the sick, the young, the old, the ones that are falling behind. They push them in the middle of the pack that's only found in the zebra community. And I just wonder how many of those behaviors we do as leaders, because Doug said it right at the top of our meeting today.

00;24;21;15 - 00;24;39;23
Olivia Fitchett
We we're we set the tone. We set the pace. And it's our job to look out for those. Yeah, sure. There's a time to let people go, but there's also a time to pull them back in. And so when you think about the zebra behavior, and especially if you go to the zoo again, you're going to just think about this.

00;24;39;23 - 00;24;56;06
Olivia Fitchett
The zebra motion does let's the coolest thing ever. I want you to think about that the way or the way we're going to end today. I know this has been fast here at the back half, but the way that I want to end today is I want you to think about those three things we just walked through. Are we seeing the whole picture with our employees?

00;24;56;06 - 00;25;29;27
Olivia Fitchett
Number one. Are we listening? Well, number two and number three, are we aware of who's missing? And I want you to think with me. Who's popping to mind in your organization? Who's straggling behind? Who do you need to really listen to? Who's maybe showing up for meetings late, consistently instead of being frustrated? Who who might you just need to, like ask hey, are you okay?

00;25;30;00 - 00;25;53;00
Olivia Fitchett
And I want in. Unless I've got maybe one minute left here, but in the next minute I want you. If you've got a phone or if you've got just something to write with, if you would. And this is a have to, it's a get two. If you want to just pull out your calendar and make a five minute reminder, maybe at the end of the week this week, maybe, maybe, next week, a five minute reminder.

00;25;53;03 - 00;26;13;08
Olivia Fitchett
Write a note to them, send them a text. If you don't know where to start. Something that everybody would love to hear is, I'm glad you're on my team and here's why. Give them 2 or 3 things. Can you imagine if you got that text message, how much it would just change your day from your supervisor? I'm glad you're on my team and here's why.

00;26;13;10 - 00;26;31;05
Olivia Fitchett
Maybe you know exactly why you're reaching out to him. Maybe it's hey, I notice this happened. I saw it on Facebook. I'm just checking in. You have to use the way I worded it. But check in with your people because, you know, belonging. I said this at the top. This is where we'll land today. Belonging isn't a just, like, nice to have feel good.

00;26;31;07 - 00;26;53;11
Olivia Fitchett
It's measurable, it's strategic, and it's an advantage. And as leaders we got to take the first step. And here in just a second Diana is to going to talk a little bit more about what that looks like, in their own specific way, strategically. So, I'm going to be hanging out two, if you guys want to want to chat more about this, I've got resources and different things.

00;26;53;11 - 00;27;05;20
Olivia Fitchett
I'm not going to make you pay for them or anything, but I just don't have time to to to go through them all. I may even ask Doug to throw to throw in an email afterwards to just really help you implement this stuff at your own place. So thank you so much.